There are some things that never fail to make me smile. The Geico commercials with the wad of money with googly eyes that follows people places is one of them. I love that little money guy and I love his googly eyes. I'm thinking about switching my car insurance over to Geico simply because the googly money guy is so amazing. He charms me.
But I've come to the conclusion that I love anything small and anything with large eyes. I love baby animals (they're small), and I love lemurs (they're animals and they have huge eyes). I love miniature hand sanitizer, small bottles of shampoo, and baby clothes (all small things). I love my niece Adelle, baby turtles, and monkeys (all owners of abnormally large peepers).
But then there are some things that I don't love. I don't love when patients come into the office and assume that since I went over their contracts with them, we must naturally be best friends. A woman comes into the office today and proceeds to give elaborate details to me of her date last night. I'm sitting there, listening to her ramble on and on, and trying to connect the dots. Now why is she telling me this? Is it because I'm wearing a name tag and she feels that since we're on a first-name basis (she knows mine by looking at my chest and I know hers by pulling up her son's account and then finding the responsible party tab. Yes, we're on intimate terms), she can tell me these confidential details? Or is it because I'm more aware of her financial situation (I know where she works, what kind of payments she can afford to make, and what dress she wore on her date last night) than anyone else in the office? I'm not really sure. All I'm really sure is that this woman had a hot date last night with a guy she met at a gas station and she smoked a cigar while wearing a sultry dress. I know a lot more, but since I was ready to shoot my brains out after having to listen to her go on and on and on, I'm pretty sure telling you anymore would have the same effect.
Unfortunately, this isn't a singular experience. The magazines in our office seem to spark discussion. From what I think about Obama (Newsweek) to why they keep putting Jennifer Aniston and Angelina Jolie (US weekly) on the cover together, the fact that I sit closest to the patients seems to keep people turning to me with questions like, "And why is Ellen on the cover of GoodHouskeeping?" I usually have to stop what I'm doing (usually not much), and engage in some pointless conversation about celebrities, recipes, and decorating for your dinner party (no; I don't have dinner parties. Yes; I pretend that I have dinner parties when patients ask me what I think about dinner parties).
I guess the bottom line would be that when you go into your orthodontist's office, just keep your head down and read your magazine. Chances are, the girls already took the magazines to lunch and discussed everything there was to discuss. We don't want to do it again.
9 comments:
why are Angelina Jolie and Jennifer Anniston on the cover together? Oh I will ask you when you get here! Can't wait to see you and I also love everything with big googles.
Ilove you MOM
YOU have big googles! I, too love everything with googles...which includes you obviously. ;)
You make me laugh, court. I am definitely one of those who puts her nose in the magazine and doesn't communicate with others. If they speak to me, I speak back but I never initiate conversation. It actually always surprises me about myself.
Actually I get really annoyed when I'm getting my hair done and my hairdresser wants to discuss the magazine I'm reading. I just want to read and relish in the quiet and having my head massaged. Please don't talk to me!
I love it! The thought never even occurred to me to make meaningless small talk with the receptionist. Now that I know that they hate it, I think I will do it more often. I think I will ask them why Michelle Obama is on the cover of every magazine. That is the real stumper.
Ha ha, no worries. I don't talk to people unless I absolutely have to. I would be your ideal patient.
I'm confused. I thought we were talking about googles and then all of a sudden you were talking about sultry dresses. I only see the latter when Lily wears her revealing dress-ups, and I don't see google-eyes much since you live in California, but I'm having a hard time putting the two together...were you trying to say that you're wearing a sultry dress with google-eyes on the way to Argentina?
You just like things that resemble...you! Ha ha ha! Can't wait to see you tomorrow! I hope you are fatter than me!
You better be letting us know when you find out what that small and ever so growing googly critter inside of you is!!
I am glad you love the little geico money guy, because I think he is so cute too. Those commercials are the only ones I like and that money guy is quite the charmer.
and I think you know that I don't like to communicate with others (strangers). I have a student wanting to enroll her that is in the military, and lives in germany, and everytime I talk to her over the phone, she talks to me for ages about how cold it is, and what the weather is like here, and her DOD school. maybe she is just lonely.
HAVE FUN IN ARGENTINA!!
Good to know for next time I'm in the office. Head down, no small talk, coversation of any kind or details of last night's date or sultry dresses...or was it google eyes.
Maybe I'll just wait in the car.
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