I'm famous!

I'm famous, did you hear? Well, maybe you were blissfully unaware; I know I was.

Apparently word has gotten out that I have a remarkable sweet tooth and a divine weakness for maple donut bars. I go into work today and my boss, who also happens to be my bishop, starts telling everyone how he heard from a friend, who heard it from a friend, who heard it from another friend, who heard it from a distant aunt twice removed, that I can eat two Leucadia maple donut bars without blinking. These bars do tend to be a bit above average size, but I grew up in a family where the more full and more sick you were, the better it must be. I never learned to gage my eating based on when I was not hungry anymore, but more on when I felt deliriously sick. You feel only slightly nauseous? Pack in a few more potatoes. Not ready to hurl everything you've eaten in the past week, plus everything you've considered eating? Try some more pie. So I thought nothing of eating a donut the size of my arm, and then eating a second arm donut. But I guess everyone else did since the word is spreading and my fame in donut consumption is growing. I'm pretty proud, as I'm sure my mother is, too. I'm not sure where they will put the monument, but I'm guessing somewhere between Dairy Queen and Baskin Robbins.