Today has honestly been the day of living hell. And it's only 2 o'clock in the afternoon. I'm thinking about checking myself into the local jail. Based on today, jail is looking pretty good. Pretty damn good. Oh. Swearing offends you? Best you weren't around today. Chet's first word might be a four letter one. Let me explain.
We live in Ithaca, which upon today's analysis, is the worst place in the world. Period. So anyway, we live in Ithaca and do not have a washer and dryer. We can either pay a small fortune and use the washer and dryer in the basement, but to use any machine manufactured in the early 1800's makes me nervous. But we usually do anyway. Well, it just so happens that today I have at least 3 loads of laundry, which will basically take all day to do. So I consider braving the laundromat, which really doesn't sound that bad, only I have the two kids with me (Josh is at some pretend meeting all day), plus I haggled my friend into coming with her 1 year old so, yeah. Three babies basically. We are idiots.
I separate all the whites, darks, and sheets and towels and go to put Chet in his car seat. Upon returning, I find Rip has dumped all the laundry out and has been throwing it all over the house. I should have taken this as a sign of upcoming events, but I foolishly plunged forward. I separated them once again (this oddly takes me some time; why?) and went outside with two kids in tow, three laundry baskets, and one giant diaper bag. We get outside, I unlock the doors, and throw my keys on the front seat while I start loading laundry in the trunk. Rip gets in the car, I shut the trunk, he closes the door, and then locks all the doors. With my keys inside. I stand there shocked. Is my kid really locked in the car? My friend is with me and we are like, uhhh, what do we do? I quickly remember that there is some hidden lockbox somewhere on the car and so we start digging around for it. Neighbors start joining in the search, but no luck. We can't find it. I keep trying to call Josh, to which he texts me he is in a meeting. At this point I consider finding a gun and instigating some kind of school shooting on Cornell's campus, but I don't because I don't have a gun. I haven't reached hysterical yet, but Rip is starting to. He's probably been in the car 10-15 minutes, watching. He starts pouting, asking to get out, and for me to 'hold you, hold you?' Finally a neighbor asks if they can call AAA, I say yes, they say he will be here in 10 minutes. Those next 10 minutes Rip is screaming and at one point, starts slamming his head into the window. I stay relatively calm, but I can't stand watching this 2 year old screaming for his mommy, sweating, with snot pouring down his beet-red face. He tries desperately to get out and at this point I'm crying. My friend starts crying, my neighbor is crying, and Rip is crying. I'm pretty sure Chet was crying because that's basically his go-to. We're all crying. The AAA guy gets there and blah blah blah. Rip is saved!
So. Do we go to the laundromat? Yes. Should we have? Absolutely not.
We drive over there, unload our laundry, and realize that even though there is a sign, the actual laundromat is on the other side of the strip mall. We haul our 4 bags of laundry, two strollers, and three kids across this strip mall, and reach laundry central. By this point, I'm coated in layers of sweat (I was sweating profusely during the Rip locked in the car I'm a terrible mother fiasco), and the blasted humidity that I hate is definitely not helping. The two babies are crawling around the laundromat floor, Chet is screaming, wanting me to pick him up, Rip is bashing people's laundry baskets into washers, dryers, babies, anything really, and I am hoping Child Protective Services is on their way to rescue me from this life. No such luck. We finally get the washers started, and Rip is crying for a snack. I brought him crackers, but by this time it's lunchtime. We get some bagels and muffins at a bakery/deli and this is when Chet decides that he absolutely is done with everything and everyone. He is screaming in this echo-ridden deli place and I am shoving apple sauce down his throat. I am honestly about to lose it and I put him on the ground (it is absolutely filthy, btw), and hope he finds a good home with owners who will love him, maybe let him sleep in their bed. He starts picking up food particles/tetanus and eating them. I don't care at this point. I'm hot, exhausted, and hating my life.
I'm sort of sick of rehashing this living nightmare, but just know that lots of crying later, we made it out of the laundromat. Will I ever go back? Not a chance. Will I ever leave this apartment? Only if promises of jail are made. As long as I don't have to take care of another human being, I am so for it.
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14 comments:
Oh Court. I am sooo sorry. That all sounds miserable. But then, I told you not to leave me and this is a natural consequence to your actions (leaving me).
Call me next time and I will call CPS so they can come get the kids and give you a rest.
That's pretty bad Court. I'm sorry it was the day from hell. It's days like that I often contemplate picking up drinking, or I just find myself saying ALOT of prayers:)
Wow Court, that really sucks. I hope Josh feels bad about neglecting his eldest son for a meeting.
You know, I used to like upstate NY, but now you're not painting a very pretty picture. Maybe I'll just steer clear of Ithaca.
Court. I'm so sorry. I have had many similar days, I can only say it does get better and easier w/time. I think. Wait I can't remember if it's gotten better and easier...:)
Wynton locked himself in the car once, but he was a little older and I managed to teach him through the glass how to push the lock up. It was horrible and I remember the panic. Your story is much much more traumatic. I'm so sorry...and yes, humidity, well, it takes some getting used to. At least it's not 106 degrees!!
Ah, yes, after my last day like that I told Andrew I wanted to throw Amelia across the room. He said that was not normal. I told him that yes it was and I'm sure every mother would agree with me. I think you should pay someone to do your laundry. And your grocery shopping while they're at it.
I feel for you Court. I've felt like that with only one child so know you are not alone and that you're amazing notwithstanding the horrible day! (I think it's appropriate to swear sometimes.)
Here's to better days ahead!!!
wow Cork I feel really bad! I didn't even know! Is this the reason you are able to go to Disneyland? You deserve a trip for sure. I think the trips to the laundrymat should be at night when Josh is home or maybe Josh could go and study while the clothes are washing and drying. Brett once pulled the alarm in Kmart when I had all seven kids with me. I acted like I did not know him and walked away while everyone was yelling "Whose kid is that?" You think I am just laid back but it is just because of all the humilation you kids put me through!
Did you ever find out where the key is hidden? It does sound like a very bad day and not one you are likely to EVER forget. I love you MOM
:(
atleast your children like you.
jayne is already in a 'my mom is no longer cool' phase at 2 years old.
Actual phrases from the past 3 days:
"mom, go away"
"mom, go downstairs (while upstairs with steve about to read books)"
"mom, i want my daddy."
"mom, go over there (pointing away)"
its sad. i'm not even kidding.
but, not gonna lie, your day sounded pretty crappy. it can only go up from there, right?
Best quote in the entire post? "Josh was in some pretend all-day meeting." One thing I know for absolute certain, having worked from home for over 10 years: there is absolutely no job on earth harder than being a parent and, specifically, a stay-at-home mom. Any other job, be it president or prophet, is a cake walk in comparison.
Because in any other job you deal with mostly rational people. People who at least pretend to listen to you.
Josh may have been in a meeting, but I guarantee it wasn't very important. None of them are. I should know: I go to them all the time...to get away from Lily. :-)
Probably the funniest thing I've read. Ever. You did an excellent job telling the story. Which reminds me, I owe you a bagel.
I just read your blog and thought maybe it was about the puking Josh told me about. I was alternating between laughing and crying. I am sure there is not a mom around who has not had a similar experience at least with the locked door or maybe I am just related to you. I was at the grocery store with Eli (in the car). It was either the bagger boy or police that got my door opened. The police are pretty fast. I can't believe that you still tried to do laundry...you are very brave. I hope that you never have another day like that. Now you know why my children have given me a keychain with a beeper and I currently have a strap that I can snap onto my purse for my keys.
Not going to lie...I laughed and laughed and laughed. Not in a mean way...Kenra and I have been there oh so many times...and still have those days every couple of months.
It is of no comfort now...but in a few years you will laugh like crazy while relating the story to Rip's friends when he is in High School...pay back is a but can be sweet!
Oh my gosh... I am not kidding, but when you said you were all crying,
i started tearing up, which is no bueno because I am at work. But the detail with which you described that story made me feel like I was there, and believe me, my tears are real for you. That was the most nightmarish day I have ever heard!
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